Bates South

My Kids Talk the Way I Pray

2009-03-09T21:31:00Z

    The other day I was sitting talking with Maddie. She is the middle one and normally the quietest, but only in public. She is by far the comedian of the family. We were talking and the conversation went like this: "Daddy did you know that the earth is a planet. Daddy, today I went outside and saw Coco (dog next door) but Coco wasn't out there. So I didn't get to see him. Daddy I didn't take a nap today. Oh and Daddy I can spell my name, and Kailee's name and .... Daddy do you have to work tomorrow?" To begin each sentence which turned out to be an independent thought she started with "Daddy..." The whole time I was sitting and looking right at her. I kept thinking, "you have my attention why start each sentence as if you need to get my attention?"
    Then it hit me. I do the same thing when I pray. Just because I haven't prayed in a few hours to even a day or so, there wasn't a point between any of my times with God that I lost his attention. He didn't move on to bigger and better things. I have his attention at all times. Which leads to this thought: Do I take advantage of having the attention of the creator of the universe, the savior of my soul? Or do I take advantage of this by only talking with Him when I have a need?
    What about you? Did you know you have the attention of God? Have you taken advantage of that even to simply say "Hi"?

I Broke the 1st Commandment

2009-03-03T21:20:00Z

    In the world of blogging the 1st commandment is "Do not ever stop blogging for more than a week, and absolutely never longer than a month." Forgive me for I have failed. And February was a great month for blogs... Amber turned 31, Kailee turned 6, Valentine's Day we spent in PA at the Shiloh Valentine's Banquet... so much to share about, yet so busy. So how do you bounce back from that? With a baby announcement! Matt and Monica adopted Baily Joy Bates from a mom in Delaware.

    And yes she is a small as she looks! 5 lbs 6 oz and 16 inches tall. Welcome to the family Bailey! I think we may have some girl clothes to pass on down to you! (This makes 8 granddaughters and 1 grandson on the Bates side!)

Vacation Clothes and Church Retreats

2009-01-22T13:05:00Z

Well Amber and I are off on our weekend getaway to Tampa, FL. When I pack for vacation I know I will not be around my normal group of people, both family and friends, so I tend to dress a little differently. Maybe a little more like I wish I could on a normal basis but tend not to in case of ridicule or embarrassment. I think that is the way most people approach vacation clothes. Go a little bit further, try something new, wear something you wouldn't be caught dead in back home.
Church retreats are very similar. We get away, talk about things that are real to us, sharing things we wouldn't be caught dead sharing back home. We open up in a real and raw way. People begin to see why you are the way you are and then have a greater appreciation for the things you deal with on an everyday basis. But come Sunday, it's back to our church personalities where everything is great and everything was wonderful this week. What if church each Sunday was more like a church retreat: Real and Raw? I just hope we don't have to wait until we are in heaven to be that transparent.

Welcome to the Age of Technology

2009-01-20T12:06:00Z

    So I have finally entered the age of technology, my first blackberry- The Storm. I'll have to admit I was a little reluctant to get it as some of my family and friends have the same phone and are frustrated with it. They can't seem to find the applications they want, it doesn't complete all the tasks as quickly as they would like, and it's more of a learning experience then it is an increase in production.
    Amazing how that parallels our relationship with God. So many of us (myself included) get frustrated with our prayer life. I can't seem to find answers fast enough in the word of God, I don't see the answers from my prayer life as quickly as I would like and overall I feel that my production in the kingdom is struggling because of it.
    The Answer: Pray as much as I Play. With my new phone I played with it and worked on it until it did all that I had hoped it would. Applying that to my spiritual life: If I would only read God's manual as much as the phone's, pray with perseverance, and watch God do what only he can, at his speed.

How BIG do you dream?

2009-01-09T09:37:00Z

So what happens when we seek God and he shows us BIG! This is one of three services Elevation had on Christmas Eve. 6000 people, 400 started a new relationship with Jesus Christ! Some would say, "But you can't get to know everyone in a church that big." I would rather spend eternity getting to know everyone who's name is written in the Book of Life instead of getting to know the few names now in my church directory. The choice is your's, Will you DREAM BIG?

Disappointed by God?

2009-01-08T21:27:00Z

Have you ever been disappointed by God? The church answer is "No, never. Whatever happens was God's plan all the time." What a liar, yes you have been. We seek God and ask for something specific (and I am not talking about an iphone or a new car) something like a child, a healing, a husband, a wife, a mom, a dad, and the list goes on. I wonder sometimes if because we have been disappointed in these areas it keeps us from dreaming BIG for God. One of the things I am learning from a church like Elevation is to always dream big and when you think you are, you are simply scratching the surface. So go BIGGER. Just because in the past there was something that seemed to show God disappointed you, don't allow that to stop you from dreaming BIG. I have had a saying since we moved back to Charlotte: Go BIG or go home. Well its time for me to take that to heart and begin again to GO BIG or go home! Where? At church, at home, at work, in life...
Check out the blog tomorrow for a picture that will blow your mind. What happens when you strive to dream BIG and you will do whatever it takes to see it come to true.

Soon is too long

2009-01-06T21:25:00Z

    Last night as we were putting the girls to bed Amber got a phone call. It was a good friend who had a lot to say. So I went ahead with the bedtime routine and her conversation lasted long enough for all the girls to do all that they had to and then they got in bed. We did a bible story and all prayed. Still mommy was on the phone. So I gave hugs and kisses and promised mommy would be up soon.
    A half hour later I was outside the girl's room putting Christmas decorations back up in the attic. I was all filled with the Christmas spirit, or maybe that was Christmas frustration when I heard the girls talking. I poked my head in their room to remind them it was bedtime and they needed to be quiet. All three instantly reminded me that mommy had forgotten them or that I had forgotten to tell mommy they were waiting on hugs and kisses. Again I reassured them mommy was on the way and that she would be up to see them soon. At that Madison replied, "But soon takes too long!"
    Have you ever been waiting on a promise from God. Maybe you were promised something, a change whether big or small but you are still waiting on it? And all the people around can say is "Don't worry it will happen soon enough." You just want to smack them silly for even trying.  "Soon" takes forever sometimes. The biblical term for this is perseverance.  If you are going through something and you seem to be waiting as patiently as possible yet struggling all I can say is this: As much as it sucks now, it will all be worth it when that promise comes to fruition.

Happy New Year!

2009-01-01T13:34:00Z

    Happy New Year! Well it has been too long for me and this blog. The holidays are so crazy and it seems to have made time to share what is going on in life almost impossible. So here is a 20 second update and then my daily thought.
    We are back in PA for New Years, I am preaching at Shiloh on the 4th and very excited, well any time I get to preach but especially at Shiloh. Kailee and I had a major bonding time last night just before she went to bed, as we worked together to pull her first tooth!
    Now the thought of the day.... I have noticed that when I am on vacation or having a long holiday weekend that I do not use my cell phone almost at all.  I probably use my phone 40% for work, 50% to talk to my wife, and 10% for everyone else on a normal work day.  This thought came to mind this morning as I unplugged my cell phone from the charger. During these holiday weekends my battery rarely makes it down one bar on the power indicator. Normally each night it's about dead and has to be charged every night.
    Is that picture of my walk with God? Am I treating my life like a holiday?  Each Sunday I go to church for some recharging but do I even need it? I mean have I worked hard enough living Jesus before the world, that I have used any of the power that he has already given me? My prayer for this New Year is that God Messes Me Up! God challenge me in my walk that I may see the opportunities that you give me everyday. That I would stay focused on the job you have given me and less on simply making it day by day.

Straight Hair?!

2008-12-18T21:35:00Z

It is crazy busy this time of year. I have had so much to share and no time to do it. I did want to show everyone what Kailee would look like if she had straight hair. Amber straightened it for her one day and she could not stop looking at herself all day long! I took this pic last Friday night just before Kailee and I went on a date to see a movie and do some Christmas shopping. Didn't get much shopping done but had a great time with Kailee.

Is it just me?

2008-12-08T21:03:00Z

Is it just me or is there some energy growing in our church? Yesterday was a lot of fun and that's why I ask, if it was just me or not. For those of you who were not there yesterday we started a Christmas series called "Rescue Plan". The title of the message yesterday (great message by the way Pastor Randy, awesome job!) was Good News in a Bad News World. So Josh and I ran with the news theme. We handed out bulletins that looked like newspapers, we even did our very own Weekend Update, just like SNL only clean! It was a lot of fun. It seemed to me like there was a tinge of energy in the place, energy that comes from time to time but was evident yesterday. Have you experienced this in your church or in another church? An energy that just grabs you. Well anyway, I am excited. This week is hopefully going to be even funnier than last week so if you can help it, don't miss it! All I have to do this week is make a complete fool of myself and maybe, just maybe we will get the old people laughing so hard, they pee a little. (Gross I know, but hilarious!)

Not Enough Money

2008-12-04T21:07:00Z

    (Bear with me there is a church lesson to be learned here.) When Maddie and I were on our date, we took along with us the money that she had received for her birthday. I paid for the big stuff like food and movie, but all the other things: carousel ride, gum, candy, more candy she bought. So as we were doing some window shopping and she decided she needed to go into a toy store. She immediately started playing with everything in sight, I think. I mean the second I am in a toy store I play with everything that is out of the box. She had her heart set on this "Baby on the Go" set. I told her that the $30 set was more than she had left from the night's events, so we couldn't get it.
    On the way home she randomly asked me, "Why don't we have enough?" I asked, "Enough what?" "Enough money," she said. I explained that we did so much with the money we had brought and we really did do a lot of fun things in one night. But it got me to thinking about our churches (weird I know).
    How many times have I found myself wishing our church didn't have financial issues so that we could afford to do some great and creative ideas?  Why can't we be like the big churches that spend thousands, even millions without blinking? I have been reading a book called, "It" by Craig Groeschel. Yes that's right I read books now that I am 30! (more about that next week). I just finished a great chapter that had this thought: God has given us everything we need to complete the opportunities that he has given us. We can wish for more people, money, space, ect but that's not what God sees.  The story of Peter, John and the beggar is a perfect illustration. Peter didn't have any money one morning as he went to go pray in the temple, as he did everyday. So this particular day he noticed the beggar, took him by the hand and a miracle happened. If Peter hadn't been financially strapped he could have walked right by. But God had an tailored opportunity and that fit Peter's circumstances in order for him to experience an opportunity from God. So what is your opportunity that God has tailored to fit your circumstances?

Dating Maddie

2008-12-02T21:35:00Z

Two weeks ago Madison and I went on a date. Afterward I thought, since I am teaching my daughter how to be treated on a date and what she should expect I should definately let the rest of the world know how to train their boys to act on a date just to be fair.

So boys, if you are lucky enough to get her to say yes, and if you are lucky enough for me to say yes then here you go (a few words of wisdom):

Learn what she is interested in and go with it. (This time was the movie Madagascar 2, not my choice but then again the date is not about me, it is about her.)
Give her options as to where you should eat. If fact this is part of the pre planning of the date. Because when you ask me if you can take her out, I am going to ask where and when so that I can be in the next booth over. (Over protective I think not!)
Pack the date full of plans, and allow her to change those plans on a whim. (If she sees something in a window of a store and wants to dash into that store for some in depth window shopping, get your tail in there!)
Bring enough cash to do it all. (I made this mistake you shouldn't!)
Have her home by 9. (If I am not on the date with you both, then there is no room here for lateness. Get her home early enough that you can drop her off, walk in the house with her, thank both Amber and I for the opportunity to entertain my daughter then get on home, so your parents are worried either.)
Find something on the date that she shows interest in so that you can revisit the store at a later time to purchase it and give it as a gift to show you were paying attention.

Yes I know I didn't do any of these things but now that I made the list I wish I had. Now I realize that I am new at this and I have realistically 10 years or so before I have to deal with this so if there are any words of advice/wisdom please share.

Dating is a lot of work. Learning a new person, in depth conversations that get below surface level encounters. Too many people simply wander around following their dates like kids on a leach. And to those you are married remember dating doesn't end at "I do." Men it is your job to set up the date, plan the event and get a baby sitter. Why us? Because our wives need to feel pursued. They need to feel that if you weren't married and you saw her, that you would go out of your way just to get her to go out on a date with you.

So Thankful!

2008-11-28T15:58:00Z

How many women would do the following? While on vacation: cook, clean, take her kids and other kids to the beach, the playground, through the market. Not many. If on vacation the week of Thanksgiving and offered the opportunity to have Thanksgiving dinner with deli turkey and sandwiches instead of the full blown dinner, would most women take it? Probably. And finally when all the kids are sleeping, the turkey is in the oven for the next day, everything is cleaned up and put away, how many wives would ask "anyone want anything, desserts, snacks, Rockband?" That's right a few hours of Rockband before a short rest until it all starts over again.
If anyone remember the Proverbs 31 woman it sounds a lot like this. I don't know of another woman that would do all of this with joy. I don't know of many women that would do all of this period! But mine did. I thank her often, but not often enough. I tell her I love her, but not nearly enough. I am grateful, not only because I am married to "super wife" (as my friends call her) but because God has given me the greatest friend and companion, greater than I could have ever imagined. My description of the perfect wife would fall short of what I actually have. Amber, thank you for being you, and I love you more each day.

Happy Thanksgiving!

2008-11-27T15:02:00Z

    Well it's been a big week for us. Amber and I went to Charleston, SC last weekend, then Brenda and Randy brought the girls down and found us a great place to stay right on the beach. I turned 30 on Monday (I'll talk more about that next week), and we are having Thanksgiving Dinner here, at the beach. It was a little weird to wake up Thanksgiving morning and look out the window to see the ocean! There is so much that I am thankful for including these three girls.
    Kailee is so incredibly smart. She is reading and writing, asking all sorts of in depth questions. She is getting so tall, definately just hit a big growth spurt.
    Maddie is amazing. She is so giving, and hilarious. She says and does the funniest things. She usually wants to share and is willing to give up whatever she has for a friend or sister.
    Rachel is crazy, but a lot of fun. She is too old for her own good. Becoming a little accident prone but very adventurous. Every morning she can she will wake up and run to my side of the bed just to see me, or cuddle. It's amazing and I am so blessed.

    I know what you are thinking, what about your awesome wife. I wouldn't be the man I am today without her, so she gets an entire entry herself. I will post that tomorrow.

Happy Veterans Day

2008-11-11T18:00:00Z

Happy Veterans Day to all those who have served our country. I would also like to thank all of those who have been fighting "the good fight". Just because you have never donned a uniform doesn't mean you haven't served on the front lines. The mark of a soldier is not a uniform but a selfless act to serve. That is what each of us is called to do as a follower of Jesus Christ; so to each who has put self aside and reached out to serve another, Happy Veterans Day! Thank you for your service.

Funny side note

2008-11-06T21:20:00Z

Here is a funny side note after yesterday's blog. Obama is not in the spell check. How funny is it that the name of our newly elected President, the name of the leader of the free world is not considered spelled correctly. My mom would say, "That's because even your computer can't believe he was elected!"

And one other note, this week the blog hit a new milestone: over 1500 hits! We have about 9 views a day. Thanks for checking it out and sorry it's been so serious lately, more funny stories of the kids to come....

The People have spoken

2008-11-05T21:03:00Z

    Well we have a new president, Barack Obama. It's funny to hear reactions. Many excited to see him in office, many scared to see him and just about every other democrat running for office, elected into office. Most of those excited would be labeled "liberal" or even "left wing". Most of those that are scared to see him in office would be labeled as "conservative" or "right wing". Which ever the case may be lets look at the BIG picture.
    As a Christian believer we are called to be the light of the world and as I said on Monday and even last Sunday, the light always gets brighter when things get darker. Now I may be alone when saying this but I think it is good that Obama is our next president.  I find it interesting that we look to people and expect everyone to see things the way we see them and the way "they should be seen." President Obama is a Muslim. He is not going to view the family the same way I do nor is he going to view abortion the same way I do. But I will not lose sleep over the fact that our country has chosen this type of belief to rule our country, instead what I will lose sleep over is the fact that there are so many that are lost in this world. There are so many that are looking for hope, that are looking for change.   And the crazy thing is, I know the one who is HOPE. I know the ones who have the change they seek.  What is the best tell the world of the Hope of Jesus Christ? How is the best way to be the Change that they seek?
    Let's not get lost in who is our president and how good or bad that may be. We have been given a far more important task, reaching out to those that are lost. Whether our taxes go up or down, we still Jesus. Whether Roe vs. Wade gets overturned, we still need Jesus. Do not let the concerns of this world deter you from the task at hand: BE THE LIGHT OF THE WORLD.

It's Time

2008-11-04T00:30:00Z

Well tomorrow is the big day. Many of you who read this will probably see it on Election Day. Just a reminder from our message on Sunday. You are the Light of the World. You are the Salt of the Earth. As an American it is your duty to vote no matter how bad the candidates are; there have been numerous men and women who have fought for our right to vote. As a Christian you have been given a responsibility to be a light to this world. As this world continues to grow darker it will be that much more important for those of us that have been given the Light of the World through a relationship with Jesus to set that light on a stand for the world to see. It is not time for the church to shrink back and hide under a basket. Get out there and vote.

Remember, no matter who wins, Romans 13 tells us that God places each person that is in authority in that place for a reason. It's time to be the Light of the World, show the world there is more HOPE in Jesus then there is in the empty promises of men.

Happy Halloween

2008-10-31T19:51:00Z

    These three beautiful ballerinas are my tickets to some good candy tonight!  Can you believe tomorrow is Nov?

Phillies win over the Rays

2008-10-30T21:11:00Z

    Don't tune me out if you are not a baseball fan there is a good point coming soon. So last night the Phillies won the world series giving Philadelphia their first championship in over 20 years. But the thing that got me last night was the fact that the Tampa Bay Rays were in the series with them. The Rays have been one of the worst teams in baseball since they were started in 1998. 10 years of defeat! 10 years of accepting the fact that everyone else had more talent, more money, more media hype and no matter how hard they tried they would never make a difference.
    Then something happened.... a change in vision. Last night the losing manager was asked, "What did you tell your team Joe?" His answer was this: It is only the beginning. He convinced them that they didn't need to hire the best individual players because if they played as a team they could beat the best players that played for themselves, and they beat the Yankees. He convinced them that they didn't need to outspend the highest paid teams and they beat the Red Sox. He convinced them they could make a difference and sure enough they made it to the World Series. And it is only the beginning...
    There are churches that belief that because they don't have the manpower, the finances, and the influence of the big churches that they won't make a difference. They find themselves mediocre and struggling. They become content in the fact that this is as good as it gets for us. But it doesn't have to be that way! Just as with the Rays, it all starts with leadership. Vision is the key. Vision is making your agenda practical and so exciting that others receive it as their own.  The Rays didn't get lucky they accepted the vision of their leader and put it into practice.  If people aren't catching your vision then you aren't speaking their language. Learn the language of your people and understand true vision takes trust. You have to trust in God to fulfill the vision He has given you and the followers have to trust the leader, that he or she know what in the world they are doing.
    One last thought... do you think there is a coincidence that the Tampa Bay Devil Rays took Devil out of their names and then became a winner? (Allow me to be cheesy for just a second) Sometimes as you try to pass on the vision and their is resistance there may be a little devil that needs to be removed before the true vision is seen by all.
Congratulations to both the Phillies and the Rays!